Warning: Full spoilers for the Game of Thrones: Season 3 premiere follow...
The time has come! HBO's Game of Thrones is back in our lives, and it's brought dragons, giants and menacingly-sized green scorpion creatures with it! When we pick up things in the Season 3 premiere, "Valar Dohaeris" (a Valyrian phrase that's actually a wee bit ahead of the TV series), the "War if the Five Kings," which took up the bulk of Season 2, is on a bit of a break.
Stannis' forces were crushed in the Battle of Blackwater, Theon's whereabouts are unknown (only the smoldering Winterfell graphic in the opening credits remains) and douchebag Joffrey's hind quarters still sit firmly on the Iron Throne. There is another "king" who has plans for Westeros who we meet in the first ten minutes, although he seems way far off from the thick of all the warring down in the Riverlands. Yes, we start off the episode spending some quality time Beyond The Wall, with Jon Snow getting hit with rocks, laughed at by Ygritte, and intimidated by an honest-to-goodness giant. Plus, he mistakes a big red-bearded fellow named Tormund for Mance Rayder, leading to further chuckling at his expense. The real Rayder, played by Ciarán Hinds, wants to know why Jon's turned his cloak on his fellow crows and Jon, thinking quickly, comes up with decent enough reason.
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